mwahaha!

i am officially on vacation by tomorrow. *hayyz* after all the hell that i've been through for the past two weeks, you don't know how glad i am to finally say "hi" with blinking eyelashes to this term's break. I'M almost done with our Engltwo final research paper. well the main reason i'm not yet allowed to take a break is because of that research. if i have it my way, i'd take all the credit for it because my so-called partner only contributed the 1st argument (out of 3) for our body and the conclusion. what the? the conclusion only makes up 0.5-1.0 page of the 15-16 page research and his argument only makes 1 page. so what's up with that? take note, i even revised most of his written works because they were either not precise or does not make any sense in accordance to the topic. i'm just thankful that this term is coming to a close and i don't ever have to deal with him again. i am sorry for being rude, but this is how i work. i hate to deal with irresponsible people and i definitely don't tolerate people who don't give a damn.

i'll see you on the 31st dear. and i do hope we don't have the same grade. :))

r.i.p.

2 years ago, it was tito eris.
almost a year ago, it was charmie.
2 weeks ago, my lolo willy..
and then, just last sunday, it was djed.

why do they have to leave this world so soon?.. fine, i've accepted the fact that tito eris, charmie and lolo left us.. we're all trying to move on. but when i received the news about djed, i was caught in a daze. i didn't want to believe it because how could he have died of dengue.. i know i know, it's a dangerous illness but then.. of all people, why him? why now? damn.. it was just so.. sad. all those moments i spent with him during grade school and high school came flashing to me like wild fire..

.. lately.. i always find myself thinking about how long i still have to live my life. i'll never know when the light would eventually call me.. and it scares me at the least. i caught myself thinking, the night i learned the news on djed, about what really happens after a person's last breath..

and then i realized i wanted to know.

what if my life comes to an end at this very second?
what would YOU do?


but setting all my thoughts aside, i just wanna say that i'll miss you, djed. and also lolo.. i'll definitely miss you. of course, i won't be a Villanueva if not for you. :)

whatever days..

've been very busy with school work for almost 2 weeks now and i swear to God it's getting worse. i hope to get through one more week alive, then maybe, just maybe i could happily say hello to our 2-week break. how corny, 14 or so days only. anyways, i'm currently on a short break from my defense-writing or whatever you wanna call that. it's tomorrow so i'm kinda nervous and excited at the same time. and guess what the cherry on top of this week.. i've got a long exam in economics this saturday. dammit.. mr. raymundo really is someone smart eh. activity ban this week noh, that means walang exams or any quiz for that matter.. kaya niya binigay on a saturday. tsk tsk.. oh well, the exam is actually optional but i wouldn't have any other choice either because my first long exam was so pathetic i wasn't so sure if i passed--i didn't, it was impossible. i have to take that test to pull my grade up, i can't afford to fail that subject. i can't afford to fail any subject. and the final blow of it all, i've got my only 3 finals in one day. i just HOPE i don't have to take it one after the other--that would be nasty and disappointing. ima check the schedule of the finals tomorrow.. oh please keep your fingers crossed for me.

anyways.. this really is my objective for writing again.. i dunno if you've visited my multiply homepage lately (if you have, thanks and congratulations. hahahah) but just the same, here is the sitch.

i dunno if ever you've experienced that feeling of nostalgia over something or someone that/who's not really out of your reach but is actually so close to you.. you feel like you've been losing grip over your friends even though you study in the same school.. you feel like you're already losing ground even if you're die trying to stand up for something that reality dictates is not yours.. you make believe that you're happy with your situation only to find yourself down in the dumps once the darkness of the night have already consumed you.. you cry yourself to sleep only to make your eyes swell like a tomato the next day because your tears weren't able to extinguish the loneliness that's been creeping inside you like poison.. you tell the whole world that time is the only key for you to make things right but you yourself don't believe that.. just when you think that everything is fine, it ain't.. because by then, you wake up and see that you've been alone all along.

bummer/